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Meeting People Where They Are: The Intersection of Harm Reduction and Gentle Teaching

Meeting People Where They Are: The Intersection of Harm Reduction and Gentle Teaching

Speakers: Dave Lappin and Nathan Murdoch

In a moving and eye-opening session, Dave Lappin and Nathan Murdoch led a conversation that peeled back the layers on how we support people living at the intersection of intellectual disability, substance use and mental health challenges. Their session, “Harm Reduction and Gentle Teaching,” wove together storytelling, philosophy and lived experiences, reminding us what it truly means to care for others with dignity, respect and compassion.

This wasn’t just a theoretical discussion. It was a heartfelt invitation to see people not through the lens of their behavior or diagnoses, but through the lens of their humanity.

The Shifting Landscape of Support

Dave shared how their agency’s focus has evolved over the years—from primarily supporting individuals with intellectual disabilities in traditional residential models, to now welcoming people who often carry complex experiences with trauma, substance use and mental health.

Fifteen years ago, supporting someone who smoked cannabis or wanted a romantic relationship was seen as a challenge. Today, that’s the norm. As Dave said: “We’ve had to drastically change how we support folks, and more importantly, how we see them.”

The people they serve are no longer neatly categorized. They’re layered, like all of us. This has required a shift from systems of control to systems of care.

What Is Harm Reduction?

At its core, harm reduction is not about forcing change. It’s about meeting people where they are—emotionally, physically, and spiritually.

It doesn’t demand abstinence. It doesn’t shame or isolate. It accepts that people use substances for a variety of reasons—often rooted in trauma, pain, or disconnection—and it seeks to reduce the harm they experience, not the person.

Nathan brought this to life through stories and staggering statistics: In Canada, over 6,000 opioid-related deaths occurred in 2023 alone. That’s more than 16 lives lost per day—a reality we cannot ignore.

The power of harm reduction isn’t just in giving someone a clean needle or a safe space to use. It’s in offering relationship, respect, and reconnection. As one powerful video clip shared during the session put it:

“Harm reduction is the opposite of tough love. It’s love, period.”

Gentle Teaching: A Philosophy That Embraces

If harm reduction offers the how, Gentle Teaching offers the heart.

Gentle Teaching isn’t about correcting or fixing people. It’s about creating environments where people feel safe, loved, and truly seen. It’s about recognizing that everyone has the right to make choices—even risky ones—and that our role isn’t to judge, but to accompany.

“You wouldn’t let your child stay inside forever because they were afraid of the sun. You’d hand them sunscreen and walk with them outside,” Dave shared, quoting Dr. Adi Jaffe.
That, he said, is harm reduction.

Gentle Teaching and harm reduction share the same language:

  • Respect
  • Compassion
  • Dignity of risk
  • Relationship before rules

Why Language Matters

Words shape how we view people—and how they view themselves. Dave reminded us that describing someone as a “meth head” or “addict” reduces them to a label. Instead, we can speak medically and respectfully: “a person who uses meth,” or “a person navigating substance use.”

This is more than semantics. It’s about affirming a person’s worth. It’s about seeing their whole identity—not just their pain.

Creating Safe Spaces in Unsafe Systems

Nathan spoke passionately about the need to offer safe, trauma-informed spaces—especially when the system so often fails to do so.

Imagine walking into a hospital high, desperate for help, only to be turned away or judged. Imagine trying to make an appointment but being lost in a week-long spiral. For many people, that’s the reality.

At their agency, that reality is met with open doors, extra clothes in the office, and naloxone kits at the ready. It’s not enabling—it’s empowering. It’s saying: You matter, even when you’re struggling. Especially then.

Understanding the Roots of Addiction

One of the most powerful stories shared was the “Rat Park” experiment by Dr. Bruce Alexander. In it, isolated rats with nothing to do consumed drugs at high rates. But when placed in a stimulating, connected environment—Rat Park—they used far less.

“It’s not the drugs. It’s the cage,” Nathan explained.
Humans, like rats, are wired for connection. Remove that, and pain fills the void. Addiction isn’t just about substances—it’s about suffering.

What Now? What Next?

Harm reduction isn’t perfect. Neither is Gentle Teaching. But when practiced together, they offer something radical in its simplicity: love over judgment, safety over shame, and connection over control.

It’s time we recognize:

  • That people who use drugs are people first.
  • That not everyone will choose sobriety, and that’s okay.
  • That one clean moment, one safe interaction, one compassionate conversation can change a life.

As Dave said, “Everyone who experiences addiction has experienced trauma.” That’s a truth we cannot unsee.

Let’s Keep Talking

This session was more than a presentation—it was a call to action.

To speak differently.
To support differently.
To see differently.

Harm reduction and Gentle Teaching remind us that when we choose love, safety, and relationship, we don’t just reduce harm—we create hope.

Tell It Like It Is: Facilitating Sexual Health and Wellness Education for Diverse Learners By Kristyn White

Sexual health and wellness are vital aspects of everyone’s life, yet for people with disabilities, these topics are often shrouded in stigma and misunderstanding. At Creative Options Regina, we’ve embraced the challenge of creating a safe, supportive, and inclusive space where individuals can learn about relationships, consent, and their rights. Through the Tell It Like It Is program, we’ve seen the transformative power of education in helping people make informed decisions about their sexuality and relationships.

A Personal Journey to Comfort and Confidence

Growing up, I never imagined I’d be teaching a sexual health curriculum. Discussions about sexuality in my own life were rare and uncomfortable, so when I began my career in caregiving, I wasn’t prepared for the role sexuality would play in supporting others.

Early in my career, I struggled to navigate these conversations, often feeling unsure of how to approach them. It wasn’t until I became part of Creative Options Regina’s Culture of Gentleness—and began facilitating Tell It Like It Is—that I found my footing. I realized that discomfort is normal and that the key is creating a safe space for both educators and learners to grow together.

What Is Tell It Like It Is?

Tell It Like It Is is a comprehensive sexual health and wellness curriculum designed to address the unique needs of people with disabilities. Developed through a partnership between Creative Options Regina, Inclusion Saskatchewan, and Saskatoon Sexual Health, the program emphasizes inclusivity, accessibility, and empowerment.

The curriculum covers topics such as:

  • Consent
  • Healthy relationships
  • Online safety
  • Safe sex practices
  • Boundaries
  • Reproductive health

A key element of the program is its multimodal approach, which caters to diverse learning styles. Whether through role-playing, videos, hands-on demonstrations, or open discussions, the program ensures that everyone can engage in a way that works best for them.

Breaking Down Stigma and Myths

One of the most significant barriers people with disabilities face when it comes to sexual health is the stigma and misinformation that surrounds them. Some common myths include:

  • People with disabilities are asexual or uninterested in relationships.
  • They cannot or should not consent.
  • Teaching sexual health leads to promiscuity or risky behavior.

These misconceptions can lead to overprotection, lack of access to education, and, in turn, greater vulnerability to exploitation or harm. Research shows, however, that providing accurate information delays sexual debut and reduces risky behavior.

By addressing these myths head-on, Tell It Like It Is helps individuals make informed choices, advocate for their needs, and embrace their sexuality with confidence.

Barriers to Sexual Health Education

People with disabilities often face unique barriers in accessing sexual health education, including:

  • Limited accessibility: Many resources are text-heavy or lack visuals, making them inaccessible.
  • Lack of professional training: Caregivers and educators often feel ill-equipped to discuss these topics.
  • Negative societal perceptions: Stigma and ableism discourage open conversations.
  • Inconsistent support: Many individuals lack the family or peer support needed to explore their sexuality safely.

By offering free, accessible resources and empowering caregivers to engage in these conversations, Tell It Like It Is aims to overcome these barriers.

Empowering Educators and Learners

One of the program’s guiding principles is that you don’t need to be an expert to facilitate meaningful conversations about sexual health. Instead, having an open mind and a willingness to learn alongside participants is key.

Some of the program’s best moments come when participants teach us something new or when we explore answers together. By focusing on shared learning and mutual respect, we create an environment where everyone feels valued and heard.

The Impact of Tell It Like It Is

Through the program, we’ve seen individuals gain critical knowledge that has improved their lives:

  • Confidence: Participants feel more comfortable discussing topics they once found intimidating.
  • Safety: Practical lessons on consent and online safety have helped prevent harmful situations.
  • Empowerment: People have embraced their rights to explore relationships and intimacy on their own terms.

One participant shared how learning about sexual health helped her heal from past abuse and feel safer in her relationships. Another celebrated their newfound confidence in online dating. These stories remind us why this work is so important.

Creating a Culture of Respect

At the heart of Tell It Like It Is is the belief that everyone deserves to feel safe, valued, and empowered to make their own choices. While it’s natural for caregivers to feel protective, it’s equally important to support individuals in living the lives they want—even if those choices differ from our own values.

By fostering open dialogue, respecting boundaries, and providing evidence-based education, we can break down barriers and build a more inclusive, supportive community.

Get Involved

If you’re interested in facilitating Tell It Like It Is or want to access its free resources, visit our website or reach out to me via email. Together, we can ensure that everyone has the tools and knowledge they need to thrive.

Closing Thoughts

Talking about sexuality can be challenging, but it’s also essential. With the right support and education, we can empower people with disabilities to navigate their relationships with confidence and dignity.

As one participant so aptly put it: “Sexual health is a part of life—so let’s talk about it!”

Leading in a Culture of Gentleness: Cultivating Safe and Valuing Teams By Deirdre Mercer and Jim Temple

When we think about leadership, it’s often accompanied by ideas of authority, decision-making, and results. At Creative Options Regina (COR), however, leadership is reimagined through the lens of a culture of gentleness. This philosophy emphasizes creating environments where everyone—leaders, team members, and individuals we support—feels safe, valued, and connected.

In a recent presentation at the Gentle Teaching International Conference, we reflected on our experiences fostering such a culture, sharing stories, lessons, and practices that have shaped our journey.

A Journey Rooted in Gentle Teaching

Deirdre Mercer: My first exposure to Gentle Teaching was over 25 years ago during a three-day practicum with Dr. John McGee. The experience set my path as a young professional, shaping my belief in creating trust-filled relationships as the foundation for learning and growth. Throughout my career, I’ve seen firsthand how this philosophy transforms individuals and organizations.

Jim Temple: At COR, Gentle Teaching has been part of our DNA since our inception in 2009. Unlike many organizations that adopt this approach later, COR was built on these principles, enabling us to create a culture that permeates every level of our organization—from the boardroom to the homes where we provide support.

Why Trust Matters

Trust is the cornerstone of effective leadership and teamwork. It’s not just about getting the job done; it’s about creating an environment where individuals feel safe to express themselves, take risks, and grow. At COR, we’ve worked diligently to embed trust-building practices into our organizational fabric.

We’ve done this by:

1. Listening and Learning:
Through focus groups, surveys, and one-on-one conversations, we’ve asked our team what trust looks like to them. The feedback informed our organizational practices, from leadership training to day-to-day interactions.

2. Defining Shared Values:
COR’s values—Innovation, Making a Difference, Autonomy, Growth, Integrity, Nurturing and Inclusive Community, and Engagement (IMAGINE)—were developed collaboratively with employees. These values guide our decisions and remind us of our collective purpose.

3. Implementing Tools for Growth:
Inspired by Brené Brown’s Braving framework, we’ve trained leaders to cultivate trust through clear communication, accountability, and mutual respect.

From Safe and Loved to Growth

Creating a culture of gentleness isn’t just for the individuals we support—it’s a way of being that extends to every interaction. Leadership at COR focuses on helping people feel safe and valued, paving the way for growth.

When individuals feel secure in their environment, whether in the workplace or a classroom, they flourish. Deirdre shared a personal story about her daughter Delaney, whose academic success was profoundly influenced by teachers who made her feel safe and loved. This same principle applies to workplaces: trust and connection create the conditions for people to thrive.

Key Takeaways for Cultivating Safe and Valuing Teams

  • Invest in Relationships: Leadership is about more than managing tasks. It’s about forming meaningful connections that encourage trust and engagement.
  • Practice Empathy: Take time to listen and understand the perspectives of those you lead. This fosters a sense of safety and belonging.
  • Be Clear and Intentional: Communication is a cornerstone of trust. As Brené Brown puts it, “Clear is kind. Unclear is unkind.”
  • Encourage Collaboration: Teamwork thrives when people feel valued and supported. Make space for collective care and connection.

Together, We’re Stronger

Leadership in a culture of gentleness is a journey of evolution—one where we continually learn, grow, and improve. At COR, we remain committed to fostering environments where people feel safe, valued, and empowered to reach their full potential.

Let’s reimagine leadership as a practice of nurturing trust and building connections. Together, we can create spaces where everyone thrives.

Trauma-Informed Supports in a Gentle Teaching Framework: Insights from Karyn Harvey, PhD

When we consider trauma-informed care, we think about healing—not just for those we support, but for the entire community of care. At the Gentle Teaching International Conference, I had the privilege of discussing how trauma-informed practices align with the Gentle Teaching framework. Together, these approaches create environments where safety, connection, and empowerment foster true healing.

From Pigeons to People: A Journey Toward Understanding

My journey in this field began in an unlikely place: training rats and pigeons in a behaviourist framework during my graduate studies. It was there I first realized the profound limitations of treating people like variables in a controlled experiment.

Years later, working in human services, I saw this approach mirrored in how people with disabilities were often labelled and managed. Behaviors were targeted, but stories were ignored. Interventions were implemented, but connection was neglected.

It wasn’t until I met John McGee, the founder of Gentle Teaching, that everything clicked. He reminded me of something vital: people need to feel safe, loved, and understood before they can thrive.

The Unseen Stories of Trauma

Trauma is pervasive in the lives of those we support. From experiences of neglect and abuse to the systemic trauma of institutionalization, the stories I’ve heard over my career are both heartbreaking and illuminating.

For example, James was labelled as “non-compliant” because he refused to shower. Only by listening to his story did we uncover the source of his behaviour: nightly hose-downs during his years in an institution. Similarly, Rashida’s cutting wasn’t “attention-seeking,” as staff believed—it was an expression of her pain from years of abuse and rejection.

These stories remind us that behaviour is communication. Instead of asking, “What’s wrong with this person?” we must ask, “What happened to this person?”

Listening as a Tool for Healing

Listening is the foundation of trauma-informed care. It’s not just about hearing words—it’s about validating experiences and creating space for people to feel safe sharing their truths.

One of the most transformative examples of this was Tamika, who expressed her longing for a boyfriend during her annual person-centred planning meetings. For years, her team overlooked this desire, focusing instead on “practical goals” like cooking. When her loneliness led her to a dangerous situation, the response was to restrict her independence rather than address the root cause.

Only when someone truly listened and validated her desire for connection did Tamika begin to heal.

Dr. Karen Harvey

Key Principles for Trauma-Informed Care

  1. Assume Trauma: While not everyone has PTSD, many have experienced trauma. Assume a trauma history and approach interactions with empathy.
  2. Focus on Relationships: Healing happens through connection. Relationships—both professional and personal—are central to recovery.
  3. Support Staff: Caregivers often carry their own trauma, compounded by vicarious trauma. Supporting their well-being is essential to maintaining a culture of gentleness.
  4. Celebrate Joy: Happiness is a healing force. Celebrate achievements, foster connection, and encourage meaningful purpose in the lives of those we support.

Relationships Are Everything

Research supports what we’ve known all along: relationships are the key to a fulfilling life. The Harvard Men’s Study, which followed participants for 75 years, found that happiness isn’t about wealth or status—it’s about meaningful relationships.

For the people we support, relationships can be a profound source of healing. Whether it’s a friendship, a romantic partnership, or simply the knowledge that someone cares, these connections transform lives.

A Call to Care

Trauma-informed care within a Gentle Teaching framework isn’t just about understanding trauma—it’s about fostering safety, connection, and empowerment. It’s about recognizing the humanity of every individual and honouring their unique journey.

To the caregivers, direct support professionals, and leaders reading this: thank you. Your work changes lives. And as you care for others, remember to care for yourselves. Your happiness and well-being matter, too.

Together, we can create a world where everyone feels safe, valued, and loved—a world where healing is possible.

Quotes:

On Relationships and Healing:

“Love heals. Connection heals. Relationships are everything. We all deserve to be seen, heard, and valued.”

On Understanding Behavior:

“Instead of asking, ‘What’s wrong with you?’ we need to ask, ‘What happened to you?’ That’s where the real work begins.”

On Empowering Individuals:

“Every life needs meaning and purpose. When people discover their value and have a mission, they can move beyond their trauma and truly thrive.”

On the Role of Caregivers:

“The most critical people in our organizations are the ones on the frontlines. If we don’t value them, how can we expect them to show value to others?”

On the Importance of Listening:

“The biggest breakthroughs don’t come from behavior plans or rewards—they come from listening, really hearing, and understanding someone’s story.”

On Resilience and Advocacy:

“We are the bridge between the world as it is and the world as it should be. Every act of kindness, every moment of care, builds that bridge.”

On Finding Happiness:

“Happiness isn’t just for the people we support—it’s for you, too. Take care of yourself. Pursue your joy, because you deserve it.”

On the Value of Every Human Being:

“Every person’s life is as valuable as the universe. Let us never forget that profound truth.”

Dr. Karen Harvey

You Don’t Need Marketing—You Need a Movement: Capturing Our Collective Stories By Jeph Maystruck

In a world overflowing with ads, algorithms, and analytics, traditional marketing no longer cuts it. The rules of engagement have shifted, and if you’re not telling a story, you’re already behind. But here’s the kicker—you don’t just need a good story. You need a movement.

At the Gentle Teaching International Conference 2024, I had the honor of sharing this message, and now I’m excited to dive into what it means to build something bigger than a brand—a movement fueled by collective stories, shared purpose, and genuine connection.

Start with Heart: Why Stories Matter More Than Facts

Growing up, I learned one of the most important lessons of my life: everyone has a superpower. My mom, who worked in group homes supporting people with disabilities, showed me the power of connection and empathy. This perspective shaped my approach to storytelling, both in life and in work.

Here’s the truth: facts fade, but stories stick. According to the Stanford Graduate School of Business, people remember stories 22 times more than facts alone. This means if you want your message to resonate, it’s not enough to list what you do—you need to show why it matters.

From Marketing to Movements

When I say you don’t need marketing, I don’t mean stop promoting yourself. I mean stop shouting into the void. Instead of broadcasting messages, invite people to participate in your story.

Movements happen when people feel like they’re part of something bigger than themselves. Look at Patagonia, whose mission to combat climate change resonates so deeply that customers see wearing their gear as a badge of purpose. Or think of the Savannah Bananas, who reinvented baseball with creativity, humor, and community engagement. These are brands that don’t just market—they inspire.

The Power of Participation

Participation beats promotion every time. Why? Because when people engage with your story, they become ambassadors for your cause.

At Creative Options Regina (COR), we’ve seen this firsthand through campaigns like 100 Acts of Kindness. What started as a simple idea—spreading kindness and recognizing unsung heroes in the community—turned into a movement. The stories we uncovered through that initiative weren’t just inspiring; they were transformative.

In one instance, an act of kindness from a group of kids changed someone’s life. A simple compliment on a difficult day can be life-saving, a reminder that even the smallest actions have immense power.

Unreasonable People Change the World

George Bernard Shaw once said, “The reasonable person adapts themselves to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to themselves. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable person.”

Movements require a bit of unreasonableness. Whether it’s painting basketball courts with Buckets & Borders or creating socks that embody an organization’s values, change comes from those who refuse to accept the status quo.

Building Connections Through Collective Stories

Communities are built on connections, and connections are built through stories. If you’re not telling your story, someone else will—and they might not get it right.

COR exemplifies the power of storytelling. Their 150+ videos on Vimeo are more than just content; they’re moments that capture the heart of their mission. They show real people, real impact, and real progress. These stories not only document their work but also inspire others to join the movement.

How to Start Your Own Movement

1. Know Your Why: Why do you do what you do? Speak from the heart and invite others to connect with your purpose.
2. Engage Your Advocates: Focus on the people who already believe in you and give them the tools to spread your message.
3. Be Unreasonable: Push boundaries, take risks, and challenge the norm.
4. Participate, Don’t Just Promote: Involve your audience in meaningful ways—through events, stories, or small acts of kindness.
5. Keep It Real: Authenticity isn’t optional. People connect with vulnerability and honesty, not perfection.

One Starfish at a Time

Changing the world doesn’t happen all at once. It happens one story, one person, one act of kindness at a time. Like the boy throwing starfish back into the ocean, your actions may seem small—but to the one person you impact, they mean everything.

So, stop worrying about marketing. Instead, focus on creating moments, telling stories, and building movements. Your story matters. Now go out and share it.

Jeph Maystruck - GTI conference

Five Core Beliefs of Servant Leadership, by Kevan McBeth

Speaker: Kevan McBeth

Kevan McBeth explored the foundations of Servant Leadership, emphasizing human connection, empowerment, and supporting frontline workers to excel.

Key Points:

  • Leadership is about caring for the people who care for others.
  • Servant leadership flips traditional models: leaders serve from the bottom, empowering employees to deliver exceptional service.
  • Empowerment requires self-awareness, emotional intelligence, and building trust.
  • Actionable Takeaway:

“Your job isn’t to do it all—it’s to care for and grow the people who do.”

Your job isn’t to do it all—it’s to care for and grow the people who do

Five Core Beliefs of Servant Leadership

Kevan presented five practical beliefs:

1. It’s Not About You, But It’s All About You:

Focus on self-awareness and emotional intelligence to effectively serve others.

2. Everybody Matters, Nobody’s Perfect:

Leaders must nurture environments where everyone can bring their whole selves to work.

3. Aim for the Heart:

Lead with empathy and kindness. Separate problems from people during difficult conversations.

4. Lead for the 95%:

Build policies and cultures for the 95% of people who care, not to control the 5% who don’t.

5. Lead with Intentionality:

Small intentional acts of kindness create magic moments that inspire and empower.

Kevan McBeth

Stories of Impact – Servant Leadership in Action

Kevan’s WestJet story highlighted the value of trusting employees:

“We serve the 95%, not the 5%.”

Policies focused on trust empower employees to act in the best interest of customers.

Key Example: A bereavement policy with minimal barriers allowed frontline workers to help customers in need quickly.

Reflection: Are your organizational policies empowering or alienating employees?

The Universal Longing for Belonging: Why Human Connection Matters, by Dr. Anthony McCrovitz

In a world where people often feel disconnected, Dr. Anthony McCrovitz reminds us of an undeniable truth: a sense of belonging is a universal, human longing. During his presentation, “A Sense of Belonging Is a Universal, Human Longing and Needs a Human Connection,” Dr. McCrovitz explored the profound impact of belonging and connection on our lives and how fostering these bonds can lead to healing and growth.

The Core of Belonging: Feeling Safe and Loved

At the heart of belonging lies the foundational need to feel safe and loved. Dr. McCrovitz emphasized that true belonging requires creating spaces where people feel valued, respected, and free to express themselves without judgment. This isn’t just about offering physical safety; it’s about emotional and psychological security that allows individuals to trust and connect deeply with others.

He explained that belonging doesn’t demand perfection but instead invites authenticity and vulnerability. It’s about being seen and valued for who you truly are, imperfections and all.

Connection, Not Correction

Dr. McCrovitz introduced a transformative idea: “Focus on connection, not correction.” He argued that instead of trying to change or fix people, we should seek to understand their experiences and meet them where they are. Connection fosters trust and creates the foundation for meaningful relationships, while correction often leads to defensiveness and further disconnection.

This approach is particularly important when working with individuals who have experienced trauma. Belonging offers them a path to healing by providing a safe space where their voices are heard, and their experiences are validated.

The Psychology of Interdependence

Dr. McCrovitz explored the idea of interdependence—the recognition that we are all deeply connected and reliant on one another. True belonging happens when individuals feel they are part of a supportive community where their contributions matter, and their presence is appreciated.

This sense of interdependence fosters a culture of care and collaboration, reminding us that we thrive not in isolation but through relationships that nurture and empower us.

The Role of Moral Memories

One of the most impactful parts of Dr. McCrovitz’s presentation was his discussion of moral memories. These are the deep, meaningful experiences that shape our sense of self and connection to others. He highlighted the importance of creating new, positive moral memories to help individuals rewrite their narratives and overcome past pain.

By fostering moments of connection, kindness, and understanding, we can help others build a new framework for belonging and self-worth.

Belonging in Action: Practical Steps

Dr. McCrovitz encouraged caregivers, educators, and community leaders to actively cultivate belonging by:

1. Creating Safe Spaces: Ensure environments are welcoming, inclusive, and free of judgment.
2. Validating Voices: Listen to and affirm people’s experiences without trying to “fix” them.
3. Fostering Interdependence: Build communities where everyone feels valued and connected.
4. Inviting Vulnerability: Encourage open, honest communication to deepen relationships.

Focus on connection, not correction

Final Thoughts

Dr. McCrovitz’s message is clear: belonging is not a luxury—it’s a necessity for human well-being. By prioritizing connection over correction and embracing our shared humanity, we can create a world where everyone feels valued, supported, and truly seen.

As you go about your day, remember: the smallest act of kindness or acknowledgment can be the seed of belonging for someone else. Together, we can build communities that heal, empower, and inspire.

Let’s make belonging a priority—for ourselves and for each other.

Trivial is Transformational, by Connie Jones

Trivial is Transformational.

As a philosophy, Gentle Teaching puts the onus on us to change how we interact in the little moments together, and to take those opportunities to remind people that they are safe with us, loved by us, and that they are good, just as they are. Full stop. That means we show love even in the face of violent behaviours, to see those outbursts for what they are: brokenness, and ultimately, to stop trying to ‘mend’ a broken brain but instead, go for the heart.

That’s what founder John McGee called us to be: Menders of broken hearts.

Tall order? Maybe. But maybe it just takes a moment.

Now that I’m a grannie, I sometimes feel the responsibility more heavily than ever to ensure that my grandkids won’t develop hearts that ever need mending. As a Gentle Teacher, I’m keenly aware that right now, my sweet littles are learning all about themselves through their interactions with the adults around them, including me. I can’t forget the significance of seemingly trivial moments together. What is the message beneath my words, when I speak to them? What tone do I intentionally take? How mindful am I of my pacing, intensity, and word choices so as to convey positivity and reduce anxiety? Do my eyes speak of love, even when the kiddos are wreaking havoc on the house, the furniture, or – god bless ‘em – the dogs? Does my presence give them a safe space to just be? And what about my hands? I mean, I just want to grab those kiddos and gobble zeeberts all over their bellies and tickle them until they squeal. But even these loving moments together could become overwhelming for them, and I need to remember to move into their spaces with a keen awareness that my presence is big in their little worlds.

Gentleness is powerful. It might have more transformative power in the small moments that form moral memory than vengeance against thine enemies ever could, because where vengeance is felt in the storm, gentleness is found in the calm.

Like when I sang to my granddaughter while combing her hair softly. Or when I don’t rush through daily chores but invite them to help choose their clothes for the day, or set the kitchen chairs up at the sink so we can play in the suds while washing dishes together. Or work out the zoomies by cranking some music and having a dance party in the living room. These seemingly mundane moments carry huge significance. So, while we do things together, I try to be very mindful of each of my tools.

I think that kiddos have just as much value in this world when they’re tiny as they’ll have when they’re  grown – even in those times when my little angels’ behaviour isn’t exactly congruent with their value. I think that above and beyond anything else, all kids need to be reminded of how good and lovable they are, just as they are. During the time that we spend together, I want my grandkids’ powerful brains and beautiful hearts to get one thing straight: When they’re with me, they’re safe. And they’re loved, just as they are. Full stop.

www.gentleteaching.com
www.gentleteaching.ca
www.coracademy.ca

Connie Jones is a certified Gentle Teaching Ambassador with Gentle Teaching Canada. She has a Master of Arts in Leadership, three grown kids and four grandchildren. She currently lives in Saskatchewan with her partner of 35 years, two dogs, and five unfinished manuscripts.

 

How Gentle Teaching Promotes Unity in Caregiving, by Charles Woodard, PhD

In today’s world, where stress and disconnection seem to dominate, the concept of Gentle Teaching stands as a powerful reminder of the importance of unity, compassion, and connection in caregiving. Dr. Charles Woodard’s presentation, “Gentle Teaching Promotes Unity,” offered a heartfelt exploration of how this philosophy transforms relationships between caregivers and those they serve.

Unity: The Foundation of Gentle Teaching

Dr. Woodard highlighted that unity begins with a shared sense of purpose and mutual respect. It’s about recognizing, accepting, and appreciating the individuality of every person—caregivers, those being cared for, and the organizations that bring them together. At its core, unity is both a goal and a process, requiring unconditional love, collaboration, and understanding.

He emphasized the idea of “team” as an acronym: Together Each Achieves Much. This simple yet profound concept illustrates how working together in harmony can make even the biggest tasks manageable.

Unconditional Love as a Catalyst for Unity

Gentle Teaching is rooted in the belief that unconditional love is the highest form of care. According to Dr. Woodard, this love is kind, compassionate, and nurturing—it helps caregivers identify and meet the unique needs of others. But unconditional love must start within. Dr. Woodard shared the importance of “filling your own love tank” through positive self-talk and self-care, reminding us that caregivers can only give love if they have it themselves.

The Tools of Gentle Teaching

To foster unity, Gentle Teaching relies on four primary tools:
1. Words: Words have the power to hurt, heal, and connect. Dr. Woodard encouraged caregivers to use affirming, uplifting language, both with others and with themselves.
2. Presence: A caregiver’s demeanour and energy can create an environment of safety and trust. Being fully present and approachable sets the tone for meaningful connections.
3. Hands: A gentle, respectful touch can communicate safety and love, especially for individuals who may have experienced negative interactions in the past.
4. Eyes: A warm and compassionate gaze shows acceptance and care, allowing caregivers to truly see beyond a person’s behaviours to their underlying needs.

Charles Woodard

Why Unity Matters in Caregiving

Unity isn’t just a nice idea—it’s a practical tool that makes caregiving more effective and fulfilling. Dr. Woodard explained that when caregivers feel united and supported, they’re better equipped to withstand stress, navigate challenging situations, and provide consistent, loving care. Unity creates a ripple effect, building stronger relationships and fostering a culture of mutual respect.

Key Takeaway: Be What You Expect to See

Dr. Woodard closed his presentation with a powerful message: “Be what you expect to see.” If you want to see love, be loving. If you want to see respect, be respectful. Gentle Teaching is not just a technique; it’s a way of being. It asks caregivers to embody the values they wish to see in their interactions, creating a space where unity can flourish.

Final Thoughts

Dr. Woodard’s insights remind us that caregiving is more than a task—it’s a relationship. By embracing the principles of Gentle Teaching, caregivers can create an environment where unity, love, and mutual respect thrive, ultimately improving the lives of everyone involved.

Whether you’re a professional caregiver, a parent, or simply someone who values connection, the philosophy of Gentle Teaching offers a guide for building stronger, more compassionate relationships in all aspects of life.

Proud Host of the 2024 Gentle Teaching International Conference

On October 1-3, 2024, COR proudly hosted the 2024 Gentle Teaching International (GTI) conference, the premier gathering of people from around the world committed to providing positive and proactive support in health, mental health, disability and educational sectors. This event marked the 23rd anniversary of the conference and brought together 400+ participants from across the world for over three-days. The conference presented a unique opportunity to learn about the research, best practices, case studies and lessons learned on creating and sustaining a culture of support for vulnerable populations in varied environments.

“Thank you to the many sponsors, supporters, volunteers, attendees, speakers and contributors. We are truly grateful for your support. GTI2024 was a tremendous success because of you!” – Michael Lavis, CEO

CTV News: Conference aims to care for vulnerable people

https://regina.ctvnews.ca/video/c3005374-conference-aims-to-care-for-vulnerable-people

CBC Radio: Non-profit brings Gentle Teaching to Saskatchewan

https://www.cbc.ca/listen/live-radio/1-66-the-morning-edition-sask/clip/16098819-non-profit-brings-gentle-teaching-saskatchewan