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Gentle Teaching has taught me that relationship building is so important when helping people.

Gentle teaching has changed the way I have relationships in my personal and professional life

Prior to supporting at COR, I hadn’t heard of the term Gentle Teaching; however, it is the main reason that I wanted to support at COR. Growing up, I knew I wanted to help people, but there is so much more to just helping people. Gentle Teaching has taught me that relationship building is so important when helping people. I have learned that there are many factors that make up building a positive relationship. That is where the four pillars of Gentle Teaching come in. One must first feel safe. When someone feels safe with another person they can open up and create the basis of a strong relationship. I use this with the individuals that I support and with the people in my everyday life. This is a skill I have learned, that I will use in my future practice as a Social Worker, when starting new relationships with my clients. The next pillar is to feel loved. Every person wants to feel loved, valued, and respected. I want the people that I support and work with to feel loved, valued, and respected by me. The next pillar in Gentle Teaching is loving. I love this pillar, as it lets people know that it is okay to show others that you love and care for them. I used this everyday in my personal life and when I’m supporting by letting others give me hugs, high-fives, etc. Everyone desires human connection, and I believe it is so important to make sure people who want human connection, get that. The last pillar is engaged. I think this one is very important. Healthy relationships are ones that have good communication and engagement. I have learned from COR and my studies to have branching conversations with others. This means to not just listen to someone, but to actively listen by making eye contact, asking questions about what the other person is telling you, and being present the entire time. I use these skills with my friends, family, and partner when they are talking to me. I also use these skills when I am supporting, so that the individuals feel heard, valued, and respected. I hope to also use this skill in my future social work career, as I hope to be a counselor one day, and being engaged during a counseling session is very important. I also love that Gentle Teaching doesn’t use the reward/punishment way of altering behavior. By using the four pillars of Gentle Teaching, I hope that the people I support now and, in the future, will change and grow with me, by going at the pace that each individual needs. Gentle Teaching has changed the way I have relationships in my personal and professional life.

using the four pillars of gentle teaching

Amelia,

COR Family Member

 

Regina Leader-Post: Celebrating the Value of Every Person

On December 3rd, 2019, COR was featured in the Regina Leader-Post in celebration of the International Day of Persons with Disabilities.

Read the article below:

To view online, visit: https://www.pressreader.com/canada/regina-leader-post/20191203/282175062982247

Patience, openness and my casual approach has helped me connect

I create gentleness with the individuals I support by being creative in how I approach teachings of connectedness, companionship and community. I come to a person’s home with an open mind and am accepting of other supports’ ideas, while trying to fulfill one’s personal desires. I have been able to help the people I support discover a sense of community, a sense of companionship with the use of my puppy and tried my best to connect to them on a deeper level.

create community connections

I taught them about companionship with my puppy, Ambrosia. When I started supporting, my puppy was about two months old and by regularly bringing her with me during my support times, they watched her grow. They were very engaged with Ambrosia and learned about gentle hands, exercise and appropriate levels of play with animals. Ambrosia was especially good at redirecting when one was was fixated on something. They enjoyed walking and going to the park, they would help me trim her nails and bath her, sometimes they even tried to play cars with her! Through the use of my dog, I helped the young men understand that companionship, hygiene, exercise and play are all essential parts of everyone’s life.

I have helped create community connections by exemplifying manners and polite greeting to strangers in public. The young men are very friendly and willing to greet neighbours, store employees and strangers. We sometimes visited a neighbour at her house after she invited us for a play date with her baby and puppy. I encourage the young men to be confident in public and show them I trust them by letting them work through transactions, conversation with employees and other interactions. I sensed that they feel fulfilled when they are allowed to be independent and have a sense of belonging when they interact with others. Other ways I have helped foster a sense of community are connecting with Pita Pit for recycling, bringing going to a MMA club to hit a punching bag, introducing them to my personal friends, going to the humane society to play with animals, playing with children at the park, and helping to use the one guy’s recycling knowledge at community parks and friends homes, etc.

In my support work, I try to be enthusiastic about the interests they enjoy, find common interests that we enjoy together, and encourage the opportunity to explore new interests. Patience, openness and my casual approach has helped me connect  and it did not take long to gain trust. At times, my commitment to our relationship was tested . I would open grounds for conversation after a difficult moment by apologizing first for not understanding, or making the person upset. In my opinion, that has allowed me to show the young men that I do not see myself any different than them and hold part of the responsibility.

 

-Jacob, COR Family Member

Gentle Teaching has helped me understand the importance of presence in a world that idealizes busyness.

Five years ago, I began supporting with COR and was introduced to Gentle Teaching for the first time. Unfortunately, I had to move from Regina soon after, so was only able to support for a few months. However, Gentle Teaching has stuck with me ever since. Since returning to COR in September, my understanding and knowledge of Gentle Teaching has expanded greatly. Gentle Teaching, particularly the tools and pillars of Gentle Teaching, have greatly impacted the person I am today, as well as the person I strive to be. Since my introduction to Gentle Teaching, I have used the tools (words, hands eyes and presence) as well as the pillars (engaged, safe, loved/valued and loving) of Gentle Teaching to improve the professional, social and therapeutic relationships in my life. I strive to create relationships with all people in my life that are supportive, strength-based and built on the foundation of gentleness.

One of the tools that I find incredibly important is presence. It is also the tool I find myself needing to work on most frequency. Being a student, supporting at COR, and maintaining social relationships is very hectic and I often find myself incredibly busy and overwhelmed. I often feel as if I am being pulled in many directions, and my mind is often focused on the next thing I need to do (support, exams, deadlines, volunteer, birthday parties, etc.). Gentle Teaching has helped me understand the importance of presence in a world that idealizes busyness. Since being re-introduced to the tools of Gentle Teaching, I have allowed myself time to put down the phone, relax my mind and really be attentive and conscientious of what I am presented with in the moment. I have noticed the impact this has had on my life, especially in clinical practice with school. As nursing students, we have a lot to think about and learn during clinical placements in hospitals and in the community. Whether it is researching medications, implementing care plans, learning new assessment skills, implementing techniques for the first time or trying to find the right questions to ask, this experience can be crazy and overwhelming. When I remind myself of the tools of Gentle Teaching and the importance of being present, I am able to take a step back and focus on the moment. I am able to take the time to focus on the most important part of the experience, the patient. By doing this I am able to then use the other tools of Gentle Teaching (words, hands, eyes) to support the apprehensive, reassure the nervous, listen to those with stories to tell and see the patient as a whole person. I believe this makes me a better student, and I know it will make me a better nurse, and a nurse I strive to be.

Gentle Teaching has greatly impacted the person I am today, as well as the person I aim to be. It has helped guide me in creating compassionate and gentle relationships with those around me. It has also helped me give myself permission to be gentle with myself. I am incredibly grateful that COR has introduced me to the pillars and tools of Gentle Teaching, and I know I will take them with me through the rest of my life.

Gentle Teaching has greatly impacted the person I am today

Lindsay,

COR Family Member

Adopting Gentle Teaching is a unique process for everyone because it becomes a natural element within us

adopting gentle teachingThe person I aspire to continue to be:
Gentle teaching was given to me as an analogy in the form of a hat. A hat is worn during the day, you can choose what hat you wear, or you can avoid the hat that day altogether, but at the end of the day, you hang that hat up. Gentle Teaching cannot operate with authenticity and genuineness if you hang up this philosophy at the end of your support time or when you interact with others. Adopting Gentle Teaching is a unique process for everyone because it becomes a natural element within us at different points, serving different purposes. It has transformed the person that I continue to be each day by allowing me to find positivity in any situation and seek the optimism required to solve problems.

It has shown me that all growth initially depends on identifying necessary change within ourselves to accommodate others first. However, the power of relationship capacity building allows us to progress from giving people what they desire (showing that with us, they are safe and loved), into compromising and then into natural win-win outcomes, which is one of the most meaningful feelings of growth and connection. Keeping Gentle Teaching within my character has taken me to new heights as an individual. It directly impacts the service I provide through COR and simultaneously teaching me the value of being present in the lives of loved ones. It has taught me the importance of my presence and how to project my energy in a loving, safe and welcoming way to those I communicate with.

gentle teaching has taught me-sawyer quote

A large portion of communication is non-verbal and based on body language, facial expression and our eyes/hands as tools to deliver a safe, never-violent message. Non-violence requires an understanding of what the other person perceives as violent – not what we view as violence. Gentle Teaching has taught me perseverance by seeing setbacks, failures, relapses and struggles as necessary stepping-stones to success and achievement together.

For example, diet and physical exercise are seen as a daunting, uncomfortable experience to most, yet it is essential for a healthy, balanced life. From the beginning of serving individuals within COR, this concept has been no exception. The setbacks, lack of motivation, struggles to engage in healthy dietary choices and adopting health-balanced lifestyles have all been very prevalent. The persistence and patience acquired through this philosophy, however, has disallowed me to give up on people in their process of change. Slowly but surely, we make incremental gains in change, transforming into habits and a valued component of our time spent together. This is only possible through relationship building due to three distinct reasons: they will see that we aren’t going to leave their lives or give up on them, no matter what we go through, we go through it together and lastly, our persistence is received as the care to see their quality of life improve.

Gentle Teaching has taught me the importance of expanding relationships as the core of providing meaning in others lives -it will never be what we do or say that is remembered, but how we make others feel through the time spent together. Treating the janitor of a building in the same fashion we treat the owner of that same building is who I will continue to be and strive to empower others to be as well.

Sawyer,

COR Family Member

 

Our presence can change the way a situation can unfold

As I embark further into my nursing career, I am truly thankful for the philosophy that COR has ingrained within me and my practice when it comes to helping others. During my last rotation, I assumed I would not learn anything new because I was placed in a community Mental Health setting. To my surprise, I learnt a lot about myself and how I care for others based on the philosophy that I have been practicing throughout my years supporting with COR. It really opened my eyes to how ingrained Gentle Teaching was in my blood.

There were many difficult moments that occurred during my time in this Mental Health community setting, but because of my experience with COR, I was able to approach each difficult situation with an open mind and open arms. My instructor was the first to point out how my face did not necessarily express the fear and anxiety that I should be feeling in moments such as this as a third year nursing student. I explained to her that from my previous experience, there is an underlying reason for such behaviour and that our presence can change the way a situation can unfold.

Our presence-Shelby, COR Family Member

She was curious to where this knowledge had come from, and how I managed to create such an inviting space for someone who was experiencing such emotional trauma. I explained to her the philosophy of Gentle Teaching and how it can completely change our interactions with people who are struggling. She was very curious, and was eager to learn more about our philosophy. For the remainder of my clinical rotation, she encouraged me to mentor some of my fellow classmates on how important it is to be able to change our approach to yield a more positive relationship with those who we are caring for. The idea of person-centred care closely aligns with the nursing philosophy of patient-centred care which makes this transition into nursing very inviting for myself.

This is only one example of how Gentle Teaching has transformed the person I am, or aspire to be. I am looking forward to see how Gentle Teaching will influence the rest of my nursing career, and how I can educate others on person-centred care.

 

Shelby,

COR Family Member

COR featured on AMI: Our Community

In August 2018, COR was featured in a documentary that aired to a national audience highlighting our approach to services. A special thank you to the AMI team and Halter Media for capturing our story so beautifully! We are very appreciative.

To learn more: https://www.ami.ca/category/our-community/media/creative-options-regina

People experiencing disability often don’t have the same options afforded to them as everyone else. Through personalized support services and the Gentle Teaching philosophy, Creative Options Regina aims to change that.

I have seen tremendous transformations in the people I support

I, Jusinda, have had the opportunity to work with people who each have their own unique abilities. I have been able to become creative in a variety of different ways to create a barrier free environment for the individuals I support. The training I received — Gentle Teaching and application has given me the tools to give value to relationships. I have come to have more compassion for individuals that have been in the system for most of their lives. It can be very complex; respect is not complex. Since I have been able to apply the skills I have acquired at COR I’ve come to realize our time and attention are our most valuable resources as people. So when we choose to focus our time and attention on people, and with that compassion, beautiful things can grow.

its what i look up to

I have seen tremendous transformations in the people I support at COR with Gentle Teaching tools I have utilized. I have had the ability to learn from mistakes and grow through relationships. I have learned that relationships are not easy in this context, but I have chosen to give my time and attention to the individuals that I serve because I genuinely care about their progress and passions. I truly pride myself in being a part of the COR family, because COR is not your typical 9-5 job, as a support worker my job has taught me to be patient in the process of growth, and that growth is ongoing. The individuals I support at COR are my equals, my friends and the level of passion I see in them are what I look up to. They have shown me more about myself than I ever imagined. Gentle Teaching is effective and in line with my values about the approach taken when having a working relationship with individuals with varying abilities.

 

Jusinda

COR Family Member

Gentle Teaching has allowed me to look into myself at what I value.

Gentle Teaching has transformed who I am by leading me to think how I should respond to situations, both while supporting and in my everyday life. When I am supporting I know that Andrew has been in and out of various systems throughout his life and these have largely been negative for him. He has told me many times that COR is his ever-home and loves all the supports and friends he has made since moving into COR. I believe that this is highly due to the philosophy of Gentle Teaching, because it seems to have made the most positive impact on Andrew’s life. Gentle Teaching has allowed me to look into myself at what I value and how it is important to allow people to make their own decisions, even though what I feel would make their decision easier. This is the hardest part of supporting, but also rewarding. When I see the joy on the person’s face when the outcome of their decision is positive it makes me happy knowing that they have accomplished this their own way without feeling like I have overstepped my boundaries by providing advice. This is helping me to become who I aspire to be by allowing me to gain experience in multiple situations in the lives of the individuals I support.

all it takes is just one step

I aspire to have under my belt, vast knowledge and experience in handling my own thoughts about Gentle Teaching. As the philosophy is still fairly new to me, I believe that more organizations would benefit from following this ideology. It has inspired me to bring this to other places I volunteer at. For example, some people who come into a local organization who is working to alleviate homelessness are making poor life choices with alcohol. When I am interacting with these individuals I encourage them that their choices are their own and provide them with possible outcomes for various situations to help them find peace in their choices. This is difficult because policy is not grounded in Gentle Teaching. I find that Gentle Teaching should be presented to more organizations throughout our province and across Canada. Though I have big dreams of making changes within communities, all it takes is some support from one place to make the first stride to incorporating Gentle Teaching into more organizations.

Christopher,

COR Family Member

 

A culture of gentleness has invited me to grow in ways that I’ve never thought needed to.

Throughout my degree thus far, Kinesiology has inspired me to care for people- very similar to how work with COR has initially shaped that for me. The Gentle Teaching philosophy has a unique meaning and purpose in everyone’s lives. To me, it solely means caring for people in a way that puts them before anything else, seeing people as individuals with names, goals and aspirations, and developing a genuine relationship with them. Promoting leadership, compassion and this feeling of contentment seeing others succeed through empowerment within their own lives are attributes that both my degree, and this philosophy have given me in the last few years. What gentle teaching has taught me about love and care for people is that it’s not about maintaining clients, or creating a following; love is about creating meaning, raising each other up to their best place in life, while empathetic and unconditionally accepting in the hard times. Each unique relationship is maintained with consistency, trust and faith in each other.

I recall a shift in my perception with an important lesson learned within this last year- For as long as I have been enrolled in post-secondary education, I have contemplated personal training and following that path in some regard. Although, observing the way trainers interact with their “clients” has slowly shown me that I could never become complacent with displaying such little compassion for another person. I have grown into the type of person that puts a name to that client, is interested in their goals, their triumphs and their struggles. I’ve grown into the type that strives to create a relationship with those I may be working with and with this gentle approach- I do not have power over you, we have power together. Accepting the gentle teaching philosophy has shown me the importance of empowering those same people to be leaders and providing them the tools to become leaders of their own lives, but also being able to celebrate interdependence with people closest to them or people within the community to create their own sense of meaning.

“It isn’t what we do or say that will be remembered

Gentle Teaching has transformed who I am in many ways. It hasn’t changed who I am, but rather challenged me to find growth within myself. Growth is not an easy thing to accept as the principle of it insinuates the need to step out of a mindset we so comfortably accept. Therefore, growth cannot be confused with change. The culture of gentleness has invited me to grow in ways that I’ve never thought needed to- my interactions have become warm and welcoming; I have learned how crucial it is to be present in each moment with people. My focus is on building companionship with those I serve and interact with. An unconditional amount of patience allows me to value a person for who they are and not what they may be going through, or traits others may have pushed them away for. The philosophy of Gentle Teaching was once described to me as not simply just a hat that allows us to be gentle, able to be worn and hung up when we so please, it’s a feeling in your heart that is within everyone. Above all else, this culture has shown me how powerful it can be to maintain kindness, for it isn’t what we do or say that will be remembered, it is always how we make people feel.

 

Sawyer,

COR Family Member